Sure, it was about being anti-porn and all, which it still is, and today (and since I'm typing this now, yesterday), had a bit of a run in with internet pornography, so still working on that, but overall, this journey is about improving myself in general. Being a better me. Yes. It's just that getting rid of porn from my life is a step in a good direction towards being a better me. That, and being better with my finances.
I don't get it really. I say I'm this amazing, capable adult that craves independence, but for some unknown reason, having a stable budget and adequate finances seems to be a bit beyond my reach. I mean, I know I can grasp it, but how..? Is there some magical wand that can grant me a wish of full financial freedom without my parents nagging on me every 5 fucking seconds about it..? I mean seriously, it's annoying as fuck talking about financial stuff with my parents. My dad gets all pissed and disappointed in me, then my mom tries to calm me down so I don't suddenly have a mental breakdown from the yelling. It's as if a hellish war just broke loose, and I have no means to help the situations. That's just it really, I have barely the means to be financially independent at the current moment. I mean, sure, my dad's helping stay on an all-cash budget now, but really, all I am now is just some person that cleans tables at a university cafeteria and I can barely afford even a fraction of all my bills. Am I doing something wrong? Am I not supposed to be a financially independent person at the age of 27 with a Liberal Arts degree..? (Okay, skip the Liberal Arts part..I mean sure degrees means a bit more money, but trust me, Liberal Arts degrees barely mean shit in the real world. I have learned this from experience. Better to get some sort of certification instead..which I plan to start in Spring 2016 thankfully.) Hell, I've even been up and down the whole making money online thing and haven't been successful in that department yet. I just don't want to wind up like some fucking 40 year old all alone in his parents' basement having mental breakdowns because my parents just don't understand I really need love in my life. So thankful I met Yiqi, and may she please see me soon. That'll be great..had to go through some crazy ass exes before I met her, let me tell ya. Yeah..but anyways, more of my wonderful journey tomorrow, toodles!
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